My infertility rant

So I am trying to convince myself that I really have to get homework done, but I just need to rant a little bit. Disclaimer: I am not trying to offend anyone with my rant, it is just a way for me to kind of get stuff out. I have been thinking a lot lately about how much infertility sucks. But even with as much as infertility sucks the things that people say to you are even worse. So my little rant is about stupid things that people say to you. I am not sure why if you are pregnant or trying to get pregnant people think that they can say things to you that they would normally. For example my friend who is pregnant has been told several times how huge she is. I don't understand it because if she was not pregnant people would not say that to her, it is insulting. Okay so back to my original rant, people saying things to me about having a baby. So this list is long, sorry.

Please don't tell me how you saw on t.v. how this person took a supplement and they got pregnant, and that I should do it too. I am not mixing together a bunch of stuff that Suzanne Somers thinks is good and ingesting it. If there was some miracle cure I am sure that my doctor would have told me by now.

Another pet peeve is having people who have been trying for like 2 months come and talk to me about how hard it has been for them to wait 2 months. Then when you try and help them they tell you that you don't know what they are going through and that they have it harder then you.

Also don't become my friend so you can complain to me about infertility and once you get pregnant never talk to me again. I have had that happen too.

Okay things not to say to me or anyone else who is trying to get pregnant...

-If you pray harder maybe you will get a baby.
-Maybe you are not trying hard enough.
-Maybe if you are around kids more you will get pregnant. (not joking someone said this to me)
-If you just relax you will get pregnant.
-Maybe God does not want you to have kids. (again something someone said to me)
-Maybe you need to gain weight, or lose weight.
-Are you sure that you have problems? (I love that one)
-Be glad that you don't have kids, I do and it is not that great. (So someone did not say that to me, but they did say it to a friend of mine that was trying to get pregnant.)
-Maybe you need to fix things in your life before you can have kids.
-You don't have kids, does that mean that you don't like them.
-Didn't you get married in the temple. You should have kids by now.

Probably my "favorite" thing that has been said to me was about our adoption. I knew a girl who was desperate to have a baby. So she came to me about adoption. I like sharing with people what the process is and what we have learned so far. I told her that I would bring her the books and stuff that we had gotten so she could see what the process was if it was something that she was considering. The next day I brought our book and everything and she said thanks. But then said that she had talked it over with her husband and they had decided not to take the "easy way out" of adoption and keep trying to have their own child. I did not say anything but her comments still leave me steaming. I felt like she was judging Jason's and mine's decision, which we prayed about. I fully believe that people have to take their own path with infertility and do what they think is best for them. I don't think that anyone involved would say that adoption was the easy way out, that we were just giving up. First for the couple it is difficult to go through the adopton process, do all the paperwork, wait, and wait some more. But more importantly for the wonderful birthparents who make maybe the most difficult decision of their lives, and selflessly do what is best for their child. How could anyone think that was the easy way out. I found that to be the most offensive thing anyone had said to me. Mostly because I think that it really devalues the wonderful gift and blessing that adoption is and devalues the sacrifice and selflessness of birth parents.

Okay I am done ranting. Hopefully if someone else read this that is going through infertility they will feel better that they are not the only ones that has these things said and maybe can laugh at the absurdity of people's comments.